My Kryptonite

Kryptonite: In superpowered Kryptonians, causes immediate physical pain and debilitation and kills within hours.

The Green Kryptonite pictured here is only effective on Superman. But I think each of us may have our own version of Kryptonite.

It could be the wrong thing said to us or the right thing unsaid. It could be the wrong thing done or the right thing undone. It could be as simple as someone forgetting to return a phone call or email. Or perhaps forgetting an appointment or special date. Whatever it is, I think each of us has at least one thing that debilitates us that no one else understands.

One of my struggles since I was a girl is feeling left out. In my childhood friendships it seemed like I was always the odd one out in a group of three. Or like the person I wanted to spend time with always chose someone else over me. After I experienced this a couple times, I stopped trying. I always hoped for that special friend to see how valuable I was and want to spend time with me instead of someone else, but I never expected it. I didn't want to be let down again.

I think recognizing this was the first step to overcoming it. There are so many ways that the enemy deceives us and for me, this was a big one. I allowed this to affect my relationships for a long time. Over the past few years, I have asked God to heal this in me, though, and He has been faithful.

The biggest lesson I have learned (mostly through Beth Moore's Breaking Free and John & Stasi Eldrege's Captivating) is that I have a bottomless well of need for love, just like the rest of the females out there in the world. And the only one who can fill that is God. I had to learn to go to Him to meet all these deep needs and then anything I get from people is, as Beth would call it, gravy.

This is a daily thing for me, and there are still other pieces of Kryptonite out there that I am discovering. I hope that as I find them, I continue to go to God to find my strength again, just like Superman gets his strength from our yellow sun.