Keith and I have been through so much -- much more than we share with others -- that every now and then the memories or regrets get one of us down. Last week Keith had one of those moments. We'd been discussing loved ones and their personality types. Were they sanguine, choleric, melancholy, or phlegmatic, or blends of both? He grew very serious and said, "What do you think I would have been like? You know, if all that hadn't happened. If Duke [his brother] hadn't died. If my family hadn't had all those problems. If I hadn't been so messed up and turned to so much sin. What do you think I might have been like?
I could tell Keith was lamenting the potential he might have had if life had not tailspun him in a different direction. I believe the words that came out of my mouth were from God and not from me, because I wasn't smart enough to swift enough to think of them that fast. "Honey," I responded, "You're a much neater person healed than you would have been well."
Oh, beloved, you keep thinking about how things might have been had that not happened. Would you be willing to hear those same words I spoke to Keith? You have the capacity to be a ten times neater person healed than you would have been just plain well. Your wealth of experience makes you rich. Spend it on hurt people. They need it so badly.
I have a lot of what if's in my life and I often wonder what would have happened if I had not headed down some of the roads I did. And what I missed by not choosing other ways of getting places.
But looking back I can see that what Beth is saying makes sense, at least in my life. How many meaningful conversations am I able to have with people now that I might have not been able to if I had not been through what I have been through?
2 comments:
Good post, Cheryl. Made me think of I Cor. 1:4. It's hard to be thankful while you're going through the rough stuff, but it's useful in the end.
this is good. :)
thanks for sharing it.
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